The Story

Without saying too much here because I don’t want to spoil anything… you’ve seen it.  Or at least something very close to it, I’m fairly sure.  Now does this equate to a bad thing?  Not really.  It’s a fine story, told in a manner unlike what you’ve probably ever seen.  Is it a groundbreaking epic story…no, but it’s interesting enough.

The CG

Holy sweet mother of crap on a biscuit…wow.  The movement and facial expressions on the Navi (the big blue folk) are crazy lifelike.  There was a while at the beginning of the movie where I was in awe of the CG.  Then what happened was what should happen in any great CG movie; I forgot about the CG.   The mix of live actors and the computer generated ones was so seamless that I stopped seeing them as separate realities coming face to face.

The 3D

Far from perfect, but still wicked cool   I haven’t had much exposure to 3D movies, but what little I have seen is basically “Hey, look at this 3D object in the middle of the screen, focus on it, watch it…isn’t it neato?  Ok moving on…”

This movie however seemed to use the 3D to immerse you into the environments.  The 3D was pretty much ever present through the film, but it wasn’t often the focus of the scene.  I think that’s what really made it great.

The overall package

If you are thinking of waiting to watch this on the small screen (Even if you have a 60″ in your basement) I think you are missing the point.  If you are going to save the $2 to see it in 2D, I think you are also missing out.

I really believe you need to see this movie in the biggest theatre you can muster, in 3D.  To see it otherwise is like watching fireworks on TV (Even if it is a big 60″ with amazing sound); it may be pretty, but it’s not really how it’s meant to be seen.  You need to feel the explosions, you need to see the burning embers and want to brush them away from your face when they get too close, you need to feel the spectacle in a crowd and feed off the energy and awe of those around you.

That’s how you need to see Avatar.

My Rating

Take any of the overall package elements away and you have yourself a decent sci-fi flick.  7/10

Put it all together and you’ve got yourself an experience to remember, an epic adventure.  9/10

I do enjoy a night out at the movies with friends, but the solo sunday noon show is a more personal moviegoing experience that’s all about me. And really, isn’t that what it’s all about?

This 3.3/10 gem (according to IMDB ratings) doesn’t hide behind metafore or other such fancy story telling devices. Yeah, it’s about giant cgi spiders that live in the snow. Occasionally jumping out and eating skiers from the nearby, extremely isolated ski resort.

Mmmm…Ski bums…so tasty. These spiders are of course a product of the conveniently located (extremely isolated) government genetics lab. A lab that certainly will have some ‘splaining to do.

I’m only a fraction of the way through, but I’m pretty sure it will follow the predictable formula of:

- Spiders eat skiers
- Storm comes and traps everyone at the resort wit no chance for escape.
- Trained military unit conveniently stationed nearby will be wiped out by spiders.
- Salvation will be left to the teen olympic hopefuls visiting the resort, with the aid of the resident retired olympic skiing champion turned ski instructor, named Dash (how poetic).
- There will most certainly be a chase involving said olympic hopefuls and the spiders.
- There will certainly be lessons learned, both hard (Being eaten for being too arrogant) and soft (Golly, maybe I should stay in school…it’s safer)
- Roughly half of the cast will make it out alive after a glorious and ingenious plan takes shape.
- Everyone lives happily ever after….Or do they? <Cut to final shot of millions of spider eggs in the snow>

The best thing is, I don’t have to think about it. I don’t have to guess at anything. It is what it is. It isn’t subtle. It’s spiders. Ice spiders.

And they’re hungry.

Still watching…

One line that just caught me was the woman talking to a few hundred kids at Jesus camp…(which incidentally is in a place called Devil’s lake)
“Let me tell you something about Harry Potter…WARLOCKS ARE ENEMIES OF GOD! IF HARRY POTER WAS IN THE OLD TESTAMENT HE WOULD BE PUT TO DEATH!!” Holy crap…lighten up.

Also…”In the name of Jesus christ bless our power point presentation, we know how the devil works, trying to keep the word of god from being heard, in the name of jesus christ bless our electrical system…” Paraphrased, but the essence is intact…

lets see what other phrases disturbed be…

• soldiers in gods army (Yeah, we need more militant child soldiers of god)
• take these prophesies and make war with them (Please don’t)
• this means war! This means war! Are you a part of it or NOT?! (Lets have our kids chant war mantras…good plan)
• whenever I encounter a non christian, something seems wrong, my spirit feels “yucky” (from the mouths of intolerant babes)
• America is supposed to be God’s nation, right? (Ummmm….no)
• (Cardboard cutout of George Bush) “Let’s all bless president Bush” (eeep)
• If the evangelicals vote, they determine the election (Let us pray they stay home)

Lets face it, I could pretty much just post the whole transcript of the movie. I think you should watch it.

Perhaps what’s most disturbing is that there are people who will watch this and find it “inspirational” while it scares the living crap out of me…

Praise jeebus, pass the burritos….

Less talking…more montage required!

Not a fan. It needed more substance. It seemed somewhat disjointed and wierd. Not to mention old Sly… He’s a bit disturbing to watch, all wrinkly and vericose veined….

On the plus side it’s better than the whole street fighting Rocky V that most fans try to forget. Far better than that and a bit more in tune with the style and flow of Rocky I and II. A better ending to the series…but still…I was not much of a fan.

I will give it a 5.5/10
For reference, IMDB has an overall users rating of 7.9/10

One last note, in the fight scenes, I felt like I was watching someone’s grandma getting beat up. That’s just not right.