smooshspace

Week 6 Day 2     2010-03-09
Max in last set: 30+15
Notes: 14+14+15+15+14+14+10+10+(20+14+11)

It’s stretching out into a long chain of continuous effort.

The first 106 aren’t so bad.  (Who ever thought I’d be saying those words?) The last set is always the kicker.  Since I wasn’t able to manage the 45 in a straight set, I did what I could, waited 20 seconds, 14 then 20 seconds and the final 11.  I figure it’s better to keep up the momentum somewhat to get to the end than to just stop at the 20.

Why I figure this, I don’t know.  I just do.  *shrug*

151 pushups tonight.  Weee

Just in case I haven’t said it recently, I love that I am doing this.  It makes me feel great.  Wanna try?

Week 6 Day 1     2010-03-08
Max in last set: 30+15
Notes: 25-30-20-15-(30+15)

I rolled out of bed today and almost immediately began doing pushups.  Week 6 is intimidating to look at.  I still have the mental conditioning that says to me “25 pushups?  In a row? You’re crazy. Shut up.”

Regardless, I began and soon found 25 complete.  45 seconds later. “30 pushups now?  Shut up.”  30 pushups later I was impressed with myself again.  I may be accused of dwelling on the following but….when I started I could only do 8.  I love it.

20 and 15 were a breeze after doing the first two.  Admittedly the last set, a recommended 40 minimum sort of got the better of me.  I managed 30 before having to stop, but not wanting to be beaten by a number in a table I took a 20 second rest and completed another 15 before falling in a heap.

135 pushups before setting foot outside my room.

Now for a quick note that upon thinking about it seems like common sense but nonetheless took me a while to come upon…

Take it slowly.  For some reason and by some strange logic on my brains part I had this funny idea that if I had a lot of pushups to do, doing them rapidly would make me finish quicker and thereby make it easier to accomplish.  Silly brain (Or body?).  Need to run a marathon?  Oh, I’ll sprint, then I’ll be done exerting myself sooner. Thinking about it and spelling it out really makes it seem silly but that is what I found I was doing at times; I don’t really think I realized I was doing it to be honest.

I don’t point it out to insult anyone’s intelligence; I just thought that maybe someone else may keep it in mind when they are doing their pushups and perhaps find they have fallen into the same habit for some inexplicable reason.

Slowing down to a more relaxed pace has helped me immensely!

Good luck to you all.

Week 5(c) Day 2     2010-03-04
Max in last set: 35
Notes: 13-10-13-13-10-10-9-35

Despite past breaks and being a touch off schedule, I had a good night with the pushups tonight, ending with a good run of 35.

I think I’ll be ok for starting week 6’s program finally.

Week 5(c) Day 1     2010-03-01
Max in last set: 26
Notes: 17-19-15-15-25-10

Ok, after my week off I’m going back for a three-peat of week 5.  Feeling better this week, but I’m in no big rush to move on to the last weeks program.  I want to be comfortable with this one.  But not too comfortable.  Must. Keep. Pushing.

I had a dream a couple of nights ago that I was in some sort of school doing a math test.  I was my current age and concentrating very hard.  There was a woman there trying to chat me up and distract me but I told her to be quiet because I didn’t concentrate enough the first time through school so I really wanted to do better this time.

I consider this a good sign.  My subconscious seems to want to get things done and stick them out to the end as much as my conscious mind does.  It can’t imagine it hurts to have your dreams reinforcing your waking goals.

I threw an extra set of 10 on the end of the last 25 because I just wanted to do a few more.

A quick update on the pushups…

This week is a little bit of an intermission by necessity.  Last week I mentioned that I was sick but muscled through my routine.  That was fine.  Saturday I managed 42 consecutive pushups, a personal best.  Still a bit short of where I would like to be but again, a fantastic improvement from my starting point.

This week however, I’m not sure what’s wrong.

Perhaps I have a caught a bug or something, but I am way off my game this week.  Yesterday for example I attempted some pushups but after only 20 i could physically not do any more.  I was at full exhaustion before I even reached the half way point of what I had accomplished only a few days before.

Given this development, I am sort of taking it easy this week.  I’m not pushup free this week; this week I am doing what I can (50 or 60 a day in total) and will continue with the official program on Monday.  Perhaps a threepeat of week 5.  We’ll see how I feel.

Keep pushing yourselves!

Under the covers in our little morning fort she says “Can I have your ring, Daddy?”

After a rough night of tummy aches and restless sleep for us both I agreed and with some effort pulled my wedding ring from finger to let my baby girl play with it.  That was the last I saw or thought of it until 15 hours later as I was about to drift off into sleep back at home, far from the hotel and our tent of blankets.

I’ve called the hotel and left a message with a  machine in hopes that the cleaning staff or the next residents will find it and set it aside, but my hopes are not high.  It feels so far gone.  I keep checking my email for a voice mail to come through with good news.

A depressing way to cap off the great dad and Lily water park adventure weekend.

Trying to come to terms with the loss of this precious little piece of metal that has been with me for the last 3.5 years has been tough today.  I’m a terribly sentimental person as you know; I’m not ashamed to admit it.  In trying to do so I’ve thought about replacing it it with another.  But it wouldn’t be the same would it?  Wouldn’t it just be a ring?  How could it be a wedding ring without the wedding?

Thinking of the ring my mind flashes to the warm and sunny day of our wedding and how amazing you looked as you put it on my finger.  I was so happy that day, not nervous in the least.  I was marrying the best person I’ve ever in my life met.

I thought of that day in the mall just a couple of months after we started dating when you told me that you would have to nail a wedding ring to my finger so I wouldn’t lose it.  Was that a proposal?  In a way I think it was, even though you tried to backpedal out of the comment.

Then there was the fellow at the jewelery store when we actually were looking for rings who in his thick European accent told us with great certainty “You will buy this ring!”  We didn’t buy his ring, but I’ll always remember that guy and how we laughed after leaving the store.

We did buy wedding bands that day though if my memory serves me correctly.  Yours and mine together at the same store, in the same mall.  It was a good day.

My rings was a bit loose during our honeymoon.  I clenched my hand in a fist for the better part of the week as we ventured into the ocean together.  You being chased and freaked out by the fish.  I’m still not sure why they liked you so much, they must have seen in you what I see in you.

I remember sitting the ring in the cupboard above the sink in our awesome little place on Sunnyside.  Our first real apartment that was just ours.

Flashes of Lily’s tiny little  hands wrapped around the ring.  I looked over at you, exhausted and beautiful in the delivery room. I still smile thinking of it.

Then there was the day I lost my ring the first time.  I was terribly upset and disappointed in myself.  You gave me a hug and rubbed my back as I sulked in bed. (You did the same last night.) I found it in the snowbank the next morning as I made my way to work.  We finally went and got it re-sized shortly after that incident.

All of these memories, all of these moments come to mind when I think about what made that ring a wedding band instead of just a small piece of shiny metal.  Then, it occurs to me.  The ring is not really the important part is it?  It’s the memories. And further to that, while it was a common part of nearly every memory, it was a small and in retrospect an insignificant part of the memories.  The really precious part of them all was and is you. I haven’t lost you.  In fact losing the ring gave me opportunity to actively pour over all of these memories and smile, thinking of you.

As long as I have you, I could have an onion ring on my finger and the moments would be every bit as amazing because it’s you in the starring role.

I still want my ring back, but after a lot of thought today I now know that it is ultimately replaceable. You on the other hand are unique, wonderful and irreplaceable .  As long as I have you, everything else is fine.

Love you.

UPDATE:

Shortly after posting this, I got the voice mail I was waiting for.  They found the ring in the lobby and it will be shipped out tomorrow.  Thank you to the staff of the Great Wolf Lodge.  You folks are amazing.

Week 5(b) Day 3     2010-02-19
Max in last set: 26
Notes: 13-13-15-15-12-12-10-26

I’m sick.  Nauseated, headache, sneezing…You name it.  So why I ask myself did I insist on doing my pushups today?

The answer: I don’t know.  I do however have a theory.

Finishing things has always been a tough thing for me.  Seeing things through to the end is a personal struggle that I have been trying to tackle in earnest lately.

Maybe it’s because I’m turning 35 this year and I think if I’m going to improve myself I’d best start now.  Or maybe it’s because I am a full time role model to my daughter and I want to make sure I am setting a great example for her.

It’s a combination of the two for sure.

So afraid of losing momentum today I decided to muscle through it.

On my first pushup I thought I would never do two.  On my 5th, 13 seemed far.  But as I kept going, set after set, it almost got easier.

The pounding of my head from the exertion was getting worse, but I was surprised that I managed to keep it up.  By the last set as I was shooting for 30 my stomach started to churn but my arms kept moving.  15…20…25….26…..

That’s all I could manage.  My stomach is still churning.  But I followed through.  I’m going to finish this thing.  I’m going to do 100 pushups dammit.  If I can do this, who knows what’s next.  A few weeks a go 100 pushups was an urban legend, now it’s in reach.

But for now, so is the couch and a bad movie. I earned it. 116 pushups today.

Take care.  Push yourself.

Week 5(b) Day 2     2010-02-17
Max in last set: 20
Notes: 14-14-15-15-10-10-10-25

Well in line with my absent mindedness I completed half of day 2 of week six before remembering that I was re-doing week 5

113 pushups in total for today’s routine and I feel pretty good afterward.

I think next week should be fine for progressing to week 6.  The key will no be overdoing the junk food this weekend when my friend and I take our 2 year old daughters away for the weekend.

A dad and daughter day at the Great Wolf Lodge indoor waterpark.  Weee!

Week 5(b) Day 1     2010-02-16
Max in last set: 20
Notes: 17-19-15-15-20

So this weekend I was supposed to do an exhaustion test and then move into week 6 Starting monday.

I didn’t.  Over the weekend I was not feeling very great, and had an extreme lack of energy and motivation.  I did make an attempt on the weekend at the exhaustion test but after 15 or so I just couldn’t keep it up.  I’m not sure what was up but I was under performing by a great margin and decided to just take it easy instead of injuring myself.  I’ve felt like I’ve been getting sick the last few days, maybe that’s it.  Maybe it was just because of the long weekend and my desire to do absolutely nothing.  Either way…

Here I am at the beginning of week 5(b) because I have decided to repeat week 5 and make sure I am comfortable with my performance before moving onto week 6 of the program.  This will also help me keep in mind that this is a training program, not a race in itself.

I did my set last night and despite still feeling pretty tired, it seemed easier than the same set last week.

I will keep on keeping on until I reach the 100.  I still feel progression.  Not as fast as I would have perhaps liked, but progression just the same.

Go me!

Week 5 Day 3      2010-02-12
Max in last set: 25
Notes: 13-13-15-15-12-12-10-25

Yet another week over.  I can’t believe I’ll be starting week 6 next week.  It seems  like I just started out.  That is, I will start week 6 if I am able to successfully manage at least 45 consecutive pushups tomorrow afternoon during the exhaustion test. 45  sounds intimidating.   But not out of reach which I still find impressive in itself.

I was a few short this morning, but I’m to too broken up about it.  The first 7 sets were not too bad, but the 30 on the last was just a bit too much for me today.  No worries.

In theory by the end of next week I should be in the one hundred pushups range, but at the risk of sounding defeated before the end, I’m not too confident that I will reach 100 by the end of next week.  If I don’t, I will be repeating week 6 until I make it there.

That kind of makes me think, what do I do afterward?  Just keep doing week 6 until I can do 100 pushups without a second thought?  That sounds like a good enough plan.  I’m sure I could continue and extrapolate the progression for the hundred pushups formula and push into the +100 territory.  Or maybe start doing pushups with small children sitting on my back…

I still need to get into the rhythm of the 200 crunches routine.  I have done a few but can’t quite get the steady routine worked out like I have with the pushups.  Time is pretty limited in the morning so it’s not quite feasible to do both.

On another stream of thought entirely…LET GO OF THE TREADMILL.

It drives me nuts to see people with an incline of 10° on the treadmill and then grabbing the console and leaning back 10°; effectively canceling out any possible benefit from the incline.  They may as well be walking flat!  Then there are the others who will straighten their arms and lefitate themselves above the conveyor and ‘walk’ at ridiculously fast speeds by just brushing their feet on the conveyor.  This makes no sense.

I think people may be too preoccupied with speed on the treadmill and will use their arms to take on the workload that their legs cannot manage at high speeds.  But this really serves no purpose.  You are better to go at a slower pace and actually exert yourself than to pretend to.  I can get my heart rate every bit as high by running a 6° incline at 5mph as I can by running flat at 8mph.  (While I am a metric Canadian, I am using mph as that’s what my treadmill uses.)  Hell, I can get my heart rate just as high by walking 3mph and walking at a 15° incline.  Speed is not the key to a good workout.  Exertion is the key.  Actually using your legs to hold you up and provide your balance will yield far better results.

Please note, I am not a professional at all, but I have read a fair bit on the subject and have compared the methods personally.  Holding on to the treadmill, unless some medical condition dictates that you should, is only fooling you into thinking you are doing well.  It’s also quite likely a reason that you may not be reaching your goals.

Week 5 Day 2       2010-02-10
Max in last set: 25
Notes: 10-10-13-13-10-10-9-25

100 pushups in today’s routine.  8 sets with shorter 45 second breaks in between.  Looks like we are transitioning into an endurance building routine to prepare for the 100 consecutive push-up goal.

It was a challenge today, but I finished with a healthy struggle and a satisfying collapse by the end and no significantly extended rest periods.  (There may have been a few seconds here and there due to my short attention span and bad morning math…)

Speaking of bad attentions span and thinking about how on my last exhaustion test I lost count half way through my test…I had a brainstorm this morning and realized that I can record my next attempt with the webcam so that I can always go back if I forget how to count midstream again.  Once again technology fills the deficiencies of my brain.

In the “things I have learned” department.  I’ve adopted the idea that if my mind says stop, I should keep going.  If my body says stop, I should listen.

The reason for this is that my mind is quite devious and has a habit of lying to me when it comes to what I am capable of.  “You can’t do 10 more minutes on the step machine, stop and go home!” it says.  To which I reply “Quiet you! Or I’ll stab you witha  Q-tip!”  I prefer to listen to what my body is saying and follow it’s cues.  It doesn’t seem to be capable of lying to me.  If I need to stop it tells me in no uncertain terms, it doesn’t waffle about at make excuses.

I find it interesting how one part of my brain can bombard me with negativity while another part entirely seems to be able to objectively listen to the cues from the rest of my body.  Then there is a third aspect of the mind that can consciously make a decision regarding which of the other two parts to listen two.

Funny things we humans are.

hundredpushups.com

Week 5 Day 1       2010-02-08
Max in last set: 20
Notes: 17-19-15-15-20

I think starting in the first column was a good choice.  I was becoming disheartened in weeks 3 & 4 because it was such a struggle every day.  Today was better.  It wasn’t easy, but it was achievable.  It’s a good feeling.  I also didn’t have to leave any extra time between the sets in order to complete it.

I see that the structure of days 2 and 3 this week changes.  More sets of lower repetitions, with chort breaks in between.  It would seem that we are going to be working on some endurance.  It will be an interesting change of pace.

It was a bit of an internal struggle to move to column 1, I have to admit.

I think most of us when we do something like this want to see ourselves as the high performance exception to the rule.  Ok, maybe it’s just me but I kind of doubt it.  I think we all want to believe that we are so special we will do it in 5 weeks instead of 6, or we’ll be rocking the high end of the scale while others struggle on bringing up the rear.

I think this mindset has caused me some troubles in the past.  I’ve programmed myself in a sense to see average performance as a failure.  Lets face it; most of us struggle during our workouts.  To go a step further, most of us quite likely don’t work out at all.  Maybe I need to adopt the mindset that just making the effort consistently and pushing myself every day in itself makes me above average.

Thinking of it that way, maybe the fact that I am still going at week 5 despite my struggles and setbacks makes me above average.  Hm.

What was I saying before all that?  Column 1?  It really doesn’t seem all that bad afterall.

hundredpushups.com

Week 4 Day 3 & 4      2010-02-06 & 07
Max in last set: 35
Notes: I can’t count.

So…It’s the end of a long  and challenging week.  I did do my push ups yesterday despite my lack of writing about it.  My schedule was all a little off yesterday and I didn’t end up doing them until later last night.

Once again it was a challenge on the third day this week, but I managed reasonable well.  I can’t quite recall the set numbers exactly, but I push through and did what I could, and I didn’t hold back, I went until I could physically do no more. Easily a hundred in the 5 sets combined anyway.

Now, on to today…Exhaustion test #2.  Which as it turns out was test 2a and 2b.

Test 2a: I think I did 35, I’m not sure…my mind kind of wandered and I completely forgot where I was.  But somewhere in the 30-40 range anyhow.  So I decided to try again later.  Thinking about it, my problem is that I was counting in 5’s.  1.2.3.4.5, 1.2.3.4.5, etc…  This helps me on the shorter sets by setting small attainable goals.  Saying “Just 5 more!” 4 times for some reason is easier than mentally dealing with “20 more!” when I’m already tired. What I forgot today was to count the sets of 5.

Test 2b: I counted properly this time. A verified 32.

So that leaves me bordering on the first or second column of the set lists this week, depending on which test I am to believe.  Given my struggles with this week I believe I am going to settle into the first column and see how it goes.  I’ve actually been struggling for the last two weeks so it may be for the best. But don’t worry, looking at the set list, it’s still going to be a challenge.

hundredpushups.com

Week 4 Day 2     2010-02-03
Max in last set: 25
Notes: 20-25-20-10-20

Another tough day of missing my targets.

I could come up with excuses, but I’m not going to bother.

I will push on and try again Friday, then reevaluate my plan for week 5, or a repeat of this week.

We’ll see.

The war will not be lost so easily.

Week 4 Day 1      2010-02-01
Max in last set: 25
Notes: 18-22-14-14-25

Ugh.

I almost forgot to post today.  Today was another off day.  Maybe because It’s a tough day, maybe because I was only working on 3 hours sleep after a work call woke me up at 2am.

Sets 1 and 2 were fine, but I came up short on the 3rd and 4th.  Coming to exhaustion after only 14 of the 16 on each.  Maybe it’s the 60 second breaks, they seem particularly hard.  My endurance isn’t quite up to snuff yet.  I had to wait about 5 minutes between the 4th and fifth set and I was able to manage 25, not one more.

I must remember despite my dissapointing performance that just 3 weeks ago I was able to manage 8 whole pushups.  Today I did 68 in about 6 or 7 minutes.  Each set far greater than my initial maximum.   That’s a heck of an improvement that I am quite proud of.   Lets see how the week goes….There is always the option to repeat a week…

In other news, I have a couple of Qigong videos I’ve been looking at.  I used to meditate a fair bit but haven’t in quite some time.  It seems appealing if not neccessary lately.

The twohundredsitups program is also nagging at me to go as well…Might just start that this week.

I think a lot of this drive to do all of these things may be rooted in the fact that I am turning 35 this year and I don’t want to be a 35 year old blob who has aged far before his time.

Week 3 Day 3      2010-01-29
Max in last set: 24
Notes: 16-21-15-15-24

A better day in what has been a difficult week.

It wasn’t by any stretch easy, but I was able to do a couple of extra over the minimum of 21 on the last set.

This was a nice change for the week as I was debating up to now whether or not I should repeat this week.  It certainly wouldn’t be the end of the world if I did…It’s not like I’m in a race…But I think I will hold off that thought for now and see how next week pans out.

I’m afraid I haven’t much more to say about it today.  Work is busy as I am converting a pile of word documents to Wiki format and any automated tools I have found are terribly lacking when it comes to translating to mediawiki markup.

Oh well, it gives me something to do in the downtime….

Have a good weekend

Week 3 Day 2      2010-01-27
Max in last set: 21
Notes: 14-19-14-12-21

I ended my set with a cheer today…a hard earned cheer.

This week continues to be a struggle.  14-19-14…those ones were okay.  I made it through with relative ease.

The third set was to be 14 but after my 12th my arms completely gave out.  I collapsed on the floor.  Disheartened.  I still had 19 to go in the next set.  I nearly gave up.

However, I’m struggling lately with my long trained habit of giving up too soon.  I do so far more than I know I should.  Throwbacks from a life gone by full of self doubt.  “Take the easy road”, I’d say.  “No one will know but you.”  Little did I realize that I was the opinion that mattered the most above all.  Now I’m nearly 35, occasionally wishing that I had made some harder choices.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s not all that bad.  My 2 year old daughter called me her best friend this morning so how bad can life really be?  But the overall state of my health could be better for a man of 34…something I’m looking to correct.

Back to this morning…Knowing that the 90 seconds would not be enough time to recover I decided to get my morning coffee started.  5 minutes.  Ok, lets try that again.  17…18…19………….20………….twenty…….one.  “YES!”

I cheered; not because I made up the two pushups I missed but because I chose the harder road of trying again instead of throwing in the towel for the day.  I walked the road a little bit slower than the set list recommended but I walked the road.  That was my win for the morning, and a great way to start my day.

80 pushups in total before I left for work, happy.

hundredpushups.com

Week 3 Day 1      2010-01-25
Max in last set: 10 + 7
Notes: 12-17-13-13-17

Be it the number of pushups or my condition today, this was a very hard day.

A total of 72 pushups today.  Sets 3 and 4 were doable but disheartening as they were extremely difficult this morning.  I managed them but only barely.  This still left me an additional set of 17 to pull out of the hat.

Sadly, I didn’t make the last 17 consecutively.  After 10 I just had nothing left and I couldn’t have possible done 7 more.  That being said, I did finish the additional 7 after another 60 second break as I didn’t want to be completely beaten.  At the end I collapsed in a heap.   A heap that didn’t win the race, but completed it against all odds.

I can live with that.

Taking the day off work today.  9am physical, then off to the gym for a 40 minute run or so….

hundredpushups.com

Week 2 Day 4      2010-01-23
Max in last set: 25
Notes: As many as I could do in one set

Today at the end of two weeks I had to do as many pushups in a row as possible.  Much like the first initial test to determine my starting level.  On that humbling first attempt I managed 8.

This morning I managed 25.  Now to some of you old hats in the pushup department this may be a laughable number, but to me, this represents a 312.5% improvement in two weeks!  Go me

Now I’ve heard weeks 3 and 4 can be killers, but I’m committed to pushing through.

Wish me luck …

hundredpushups.com

I’ve also been eying the sister site twohundredsitups.com Hmmm….

Week 2 Day 3      2010-01-22
Max in last set: 16
Notes: 12-13-10-10-16

That was my reaction to this morning’s set list.  Perhaps it was the transition to all double digits in the sets.  A small difference in reality, but to the 6:25am mind it appears to be an insurmountable hurdle. Set 5 said “at least 15″

“Bullscat!”, said I.  On Wednesday I was afraid of doing a face plant and eeking out the 14th was agony…. “It will never happen.”

But like a good little soldier I started out despite my misgivings.  The first couple were easy this morning but sets 3 and 4 became a struggle.  Again, the last set of ‘max’ was weighing heavily on my mind.

Something I’ve come to realize lately is that my mind really is my worst enemy when it comes to any kind of workout.  The self doubt and anticipation of failure is really more of a hurdle to overcome than the workout itself.  A good example of this was during one of this weeks cardio workouts.  After 15 minutes on the treadmill I was nearly fully convinced that I had to stop.  My hand was hovering over the button as the pain and tightness in my calves was begging me to just push it and go home.  It took a fair bit of effort but I decided to do just 5 more minutes and make it to 20 minutes.  I stayed on for a full 30 minutes extra, for a total of 45, and by the end I felt great.  I’ve often heard of the idea of “mind over matter” but at this point for me I think the greater truth is that I need to master “mind over mind”.  I am fighting my own thoughts of failure and self limitation.

How do I win these mental skirmishes?  Small goals.  On the treadmill I didn’t decide to run for 30 more minutes.  I chose 5.  Had I initially shot for 30 I am quite certain I would have quit then and there as the goal was too much to fathom at the time.  This is the same approach I took when I quit smoking.  I never decided to quit for life; my addiction would never have let that happen and the panic would have (and often did) pull me back in.  I just started deciding that I wouldn’t have this smoke.   Grand life changing decisions are hard for creatures of habit to make, but getting into the habit of making small positive decisions can make a world of difference.

But back to the pushups…When I reached the last set I was still convinced that I couldn’t do 15.  “Insurmountable.” said my mind.  But for some reason, some reason I can’t quite logically explain, when I told myself that I was only going to do another set of 10 immediately followed up by a set of 5, my mind responded “Yeah, I can do that…”   Mysteries of the mind….

16 pushups later (16 that were not nearly as tough as I imagined) I was pretty impressed with myself.  Even though it was difficult to lift my kids morning bottle with rubber arms.

Mind over mind.  It works for me.

hundredpushups.com

(That was for more long winded than I had originally expected it to be…)