Dear Lily: The Little Things
It’s been a long week for your dear old dad my dear.
My dad (Papa) is recovering from surgery. He’s doing well, but it’s always hard to see someone you love in pain. While you may go on with your life almost normally, it’s a feeling that’s always there in the back of your mind, weighing you down slightly.
I’d say that I hope you never have to deal with watching a loved one endure pain, but that would be unrealistic. It’s one of those inevitabilities of life and the world.
With something like that in your mind you may find that the small irritants in your life may seem larger. Much larger. A spilt coffee may make you want to yell at a kitten and go back to bed. A stubbed toe may make you want to kick the wall even harder to teach it a lesson. A commercial for hemorrhoid cream may bring you to the brink of tears with it’s lamenting song…
All rather irrational responses to everyday situations, yet at the time they seem to make so much sense.
But if I may offer some advice… Indulge the irrationalities up to a point. They do offer a vent to release a bit of built up pressure but don’t let them take over. Recognize them for what they are and reign them in. Take that energy and find a more productive way to deal with it. Bake dad some cookies for instance. You will be happier in the end, and you may stop what can often be a downward spiral into anger that is hard to stop once it’s in full swing.
If you try to suppress your emotions, it will only work for a while, and you will explode later. If you let them run wild, you will feel out of control, and likely feel worse because being out of control is rarely a good feeling. Instead, try to guide them and use them to your advantage where possible. Pour them into art or or something else that you love.
It took me a long time to learn what I mentioned above and I hope you do too. Ideally before you are a teenager, because man…that shit scares me.
Tags: Dear Lily, Lily, parenthood
